Obaa Yaa
My husband doubts paternity of our children
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Dear Obaa Yaa,
We have been married for 10 years and blessed with four children – two boys and two girls.
Recently my husband has been making statements suggesting that the children do not resemble him and therefore suspect that l had extra-marital affair.
We went for DNA tests and the results show that the four children are his.
Despite this evidence, he still does not believe it. What should I do because I am getting confused with the situation?
Kruwaa, Taifa.
****
Dear Kruwaa,
There is a lot of suspicion in marriage if children do not resemble their fathers. There are similar situations when these children do not resemble their mothers that carried the pregnancy for nine months, yet no one raises any alarm over it.
There are instances where some children resemble relatives of either parents.
When there are doubts, the only accurate means to ascertain the truth is through a DNA test.
If you have gone through this scientific method to verify the paternity of the children and your husband is still not satisfied, then one cannot tell what will convince him.
Once your hands are clean in this matter, remain calm and try to provide the necessary assistance your children need. Since he is still not convinced that the children are his, there is a likelihood that he will not lend his support in their upbringing.
Obaa Yaa
What happened
A CEO visited his office and saw a man who was scrolling through his phone while sitting on a sofa.
The CEO asked, “What are you doing?”
The man replied, “Wasting my time until I’ll get paid.”
The CEO was furious, “What is your weekly salary!?”
Man, “$1000”
The CEO counted $2000 and gave it to the man, “Take this money and get out! You don’t work here anymore!”
The man silently took the money and left.
CEO walked up to the reception, “By the way, who was this guy?”
The receptionist said, “Pizza delivery”.
Obaa Yaa
My father claims he was cursed
I didn’t understand why my father abandoned me as a child until he appeared recently and told me my mom placed a curse on him.
I was about thirteen or fifteen, my mom took me to the front of a big house and told me that is where I belong.
I knocked the door and the man sacked me from the house to go back to my mother.
Life with my mother was very tough until God came through for me to gain a scholarship.
Years later, I’d returned from abroad when this man walked up to me apologising.
I take care of him and provide him with everything. He needs my attention but I doubt if he will get that from me because he didn’t take care of me.
Jojo, USA.
Dear Jojo,
This is such a heart breaking story. No child deserves to grow up wondering why a parent was absent or feeling abandoned.
If your father’s explanation is true, the responsibility for leaving you still rests with him. A curse, fear, or conflict with your mother may explain his decisions, but it does not excuse abandoning his child.
Parents have a duty to love, protect, and remain present in their children’s lives, regardless of the problems between them.
Now that he has returned, it is reasonable to listen to what he has to say, but you do not have to accept everything without question. Ask him honest questions about why he stayed away for so many years, why he never tried to reach you, and what he hopes to achieve by reconnecting now. His willingness to take responsibility for his choices is more important than the explanation he gives.
At the same time, try not to carry the burden of your parents’ conflict. Whatever happened between them was their issue, not yours. You were an innocent child who deserved the love and presence of both parents.
If you choose to rebuild a relationship with your father, let it happen gradually. Trust is earned through consistent actions, not just words. If you decide not to have a close relationship with him, that is also your right. Forgiveness, if you choose it, should be for your own peace of mind, not because you are obligated to overlook the pain you experienced.
Most importantly, remember that your worth was never determined by your father’s absence. His choices reflect his decisions, not your value as a person.
The past cannot be changed, but how you respond now can help you find healing and peace.




