Dear Obaa Yaa,

Thank you for publishing my article with the heading above. I am back to answer your two questions.

Luckily, my in-laws are in their family house whilst we are in our own house. It all started when my husband started building a house.

I didn’t know they disliked me. I’ve always tried to play my role as an in-law.

But upon an attitude they de­veloped, I have stopped.

Now, they come in groups to my house to insult me for no reason. My step daughter who is in Junior High School (JHS) 3 has been turned against me.

Now the girl only visit the house just to disrespect me and return to her aunties.

My husband mostly get angry over his family’s behaviour and exchange words with them some­times. They insult him in turn, claiming I have cast a spell on him.

They are under the impression that my husband has transferred all the household properties to me, including two cars he has already registered in my name.

The situation is very painful and distressing. We are both worried.

My children are much worried because they can no longer visit the family house.

Obaa, let me hear from you soon, as this man needs to bless the marriage at the church.

Cecilia Antwi,

Mampong

Dear Cecilia,

Thanks for responding to our letter. The situation calls for a family meeting to resolve the issue once and for all.

Make a formal complaint to your family head and let him summon both families for a formal arbitration so that both parties can air their grievances to pave the way for differences to be ironed out.

You may also complain to your pastor to act in concert with the family head to make the summons a more effective one.

 Dear Obaa Yaa,

Growing up, life has not been easy for my family, especially my mother. Both parents were famers, even when my daddy was alive, it was my mother who made sure we stayed in school.

I nearly gave up on life, but my mother was my pillar and source of inspiration. I nearly drop out of school because of school fees. Anytime I ask my dad for money, he always tells me he doesn’t have.

By the time I completed school and stood on my feet, she has sold all her assets and properties to put me and my siblings through school.

I am now married and doing so well. Daddy is no more. I have told her to relocate to the city so that I can take good care of her, but she has decided to stay in the village.

I am thinking I should invest my resourc­es into building a spacious one bedroom self-contained house for her over there.

I discussed this issue with my wife and she is suggesting we build a family house so that my mother will come and stay in Accra.

Should I build my family house or moth­er’s house?

Benson, Sunyani.

Dear Benson,

It is very clear you have good intentions. However, prioritise building for your family first. Mummy is old and she needs to be ca­tered for. She can come and stay with your family for some time until she moves to her newly furnished one bedroom.

When she moves in with you, it will lessen your financial burden. Continue to support your mother in the village, give her the best while you can, because she has made you who you are today.

Let your wife be in the known that, your mother will be staying with you. At least she can assist you in taking care of the children to ease some burden.