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Refugee crowned world’s fastest pizza maker

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Jaff practiced twice a week for the competition

Crafting three in just 70 seconds, a refugee from Iraq has been crowned the world’s fastest pizza maker.

Zagros Jaff, 33, had never seen a pizza before he arrived in the UK 17 years ago but having spent the last 15 years he managed to learn a thing or two.

Wowing judges and a crowd of 8,000 at a Hotel in Las Vegas, Jaff fought off pizza makers from around the globe to claim his crown and won $3,000.

Celebrating his victory, he said: “It was a great feeling — I am so excited to have won. I practised for all these years continuously, so it was such a great moment.”

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Jaff practised twice a week for at least seven weeks prior to the competition, with his speed theoretically meaning he could produce 150 pizzas per hour.  —arabnews.com

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The drunk man

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A drunk man comes home late. His wife sees him and angrily exclaims, “Are you drunk again?!”

The man shakes his head and answers, “No, I am not drunk!”

“Okay, then prove it. There’s a clock over there. Can you tell the time?”

“Of course I can!” says the man.

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He turns toward the clock and screams, “Hey! I am not drunk!”

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I farted in bed

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I said to my wife “1-0”.

She farted and said “1 all”.

I farted and said “2-1”.

She farted and said “2 all”.

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I then had a wet fart which soiled the bed.

My wife said, “What was that?”

I said “Half time. Switch sides”.

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