Esaaba and Baaba were the only children of their parents. Esaaba was two years older than Baaba. They had a good, com­fortable upbringing, but Mama and Dada just could not hide the fact that Baaba was their favourite.

They were both good in school, but Baaba was brilliant, all the way to university. She had a sharp mind, she was witty, and very pretty. Boys followed her like flies, and she had a way of shrugging them off with­out offending them.

Baaba was the practical type. She took her time, and got things done. Esaaba came out with a second class upper in Biochemistry, and Baaba got a first class in Pharmacy. For most of the time they got along quite well, but sometimes they had strong disagreements which only worsened when their parents took Baaba’s side.

When that happened, Esaaba would drop the argument or back out of the issue of contention and walk away. That often made things much worse. Two years after grad­uation, Baaba married a doctor she had met in the university. He was certainly a great guy, both in looks and character.

They had two kids in two years, and settled down to a peaceful life. Esaaba was still living with their parents and at the age of twenty-eight, was not showing any sign of settling down with a guy. Initially their parents only dropped hints every now and then that she should be giving the issue of mar­riage some consideration.

She would also drop a word or two to indicate that the issue of marriage was certainly on her mind, but that she was firmly convinced that it was wrong for a woman to even attempt to look for a man.

The time she was convinced would certainly come, and she was not going to force it. Then Stanley Forson appeared on the scene. He lived with his family at the en­trance to the Estates, whilst they were at the other end, some five kilometres away.

He attended an engineering school in Germany and came home to establish a shop that provid­ed hi-tech servicing for Mercedes Benz, Golf and other German cars.

He was obviously doing well, and often travelled to Germany. He visited a few times, and we went out to some restaurants. Mr and Mrs Essel took a great liking to him, especially when he brought them gifts when he returned from Hanover, where he was previously based.

One evening they called Esaaba and asked her what she thought of Stanley as a husband. It was obvi­ous, they said that he was interest­ed in her, and the least she could do was return the affection he was showing her.

Esaaba replied that she was doing enough to reciprocate the time Stanley was spending on her. She had cooked a nice meal and invited him to supper, for example, and he had certainly enjoyed himself. She had also bought him two shirts, one on his birthday and the other when he was leaving on one of his trips to Germany.

And she called him regularly, even when he was in Germany. But while they had developed a good friendship, Stanley had not even come close to indicating any interest in a relationship, let alone marriage. She said that the best thing to do at that time was to wait, and give him time to sort out whatever issues he had. But they had other plans, and they put them into motion without informing her.

She learned later that they invit­ed him home one evening, and vir­tually told him that having known him and his family for many years, they considered him a decent young man with a great future. They had naturally taken note of his friendship with their daughter, and wished to assure him that if he had any issues regarding the future of the relationship, he could count on them to find a solution.

They went further to say that marriage was an institution that was built over time, that there was never an ideal time to get married, but two young people can decide to join together and build a lasting relationship.

Two days later, Stanley invited Esaaba out for a drink. He picked her up, and he drove to a snack joint nearby. After they had taken their first sip, he drew closer and said ‘Esaaba, we have been friends for a while, and I believe we know each other well. I think it is time we took our relationship to another level.

I would like to ask you, will you be my wife?’ He took a ring from his breast pocket and continued, ‘I got this for you. Of course, I am not asking you to start wearing it now. I would like you to take it, and when we eventually do the traditional and official ceremonies, you can start wearing it’.

I tried to hide my surprise and thought of something to say. ‘Stanley’ Esaaba said, ‘I am really surprised. Thank you very much. What shall I say? Yes, we have known each other for a while. I am certainly interested in your pro­posal.

I will only make a humble re­quest that you let me know your plans for the future. If I am going to be your wife, then I would like to know what plans you have for us. I hope you understand what I am saying.’

‘Yes, certainly. I understand you perfectly well. I think it’s in order. I just wanted you to know what my intentions are. In the coming days and weeks I will discuss my plans with you, then we can go forward. So will you accept the ring?’

‘Yes’, she said. Certainly. ‘You have already said that you will discuss your plans with me, so on that basis I accept it’.Esaaba did not say anything to her parents about Stanley’s proposal. She spent some days wondering what exactly lay behind it. Although she always hoped to enter into a relationship, she had not thought about how it could affect her life.

She was a Teaching Assistant at the Biochemistry Department, and she was considering two options. She could start a three year Mas­ter’s Degree programme at the Department whilst still a teaching assistant, or she could apply for a scholarship to do further studies, preferably in Europe.

If she was going to marry Stan­ley, then she had to review all those plans. She had not thought about them because they had not come up in the times she spent with him.

They had spent some time together, but they had not dis­cussed anything that indicated an interest in a future relationship. She had visited his home once, and never been to his workplace, even though she knew where he worked. She had no objection to a relationship with him, but she would wish to know more about him.

So she decided that whilst wait­ing for him to open up regarding his plans, she would also start making some moves. She decided to wait for a week or two, and visit him at his workplace. He went to the house on two occasions, but they carried on as usual, although she noticed that he spent a few min­utes chatting with her parents each time.

By Ehow de Heer