Odd News
Husband and Wife Joke
• Wife: “How is it going, honey!”
Husband: “I have a big problem at work.”
Wife: ”Your problem is our problem! Tell me what has happened!”
Husband: “Then, congratulations, we will become parents!”
Wife: “Why is that, honey?”
Husband: “Our secretary is pregnant!”
• Wife: “I wish I was a newspaper so I could be in your hands all day”
Husband: “I also wish you were a newspaper so I could have a new one everyday.”
• A boy asked his dad – “Dad, what’s the difference between confident and confidential, the dad replied- “You are my son, I am confident about that. Your friend over there is also my son but that is confidential”
• Someone asked an old man- “Sir, even after 70 years of age, you still call your wife honey, darling, sweetheart… what’s the secret behind that? The old man replied- “Shortly after I married her, I forgot her name and I am scared to ask.”
How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.
I couldn’t figure out why the baseball kept getting larger. Then it hit me.
What do you call a boomerang that won’t come back? A stick.
What did the full glass say to the empty glass? You look drunk.
Justice is a dish best served cold. Otherwise, it’s just water.
What do call a criminal landing an airplane? Condescending.
Why should you never throw grandpa’s false teeth at a vehicle? You might denture car.
Why are Christmas trees bad at knitting? They always drop their needles.
What did the lunch box say to the refrigerator? Don’t hate me because I’m a little cooler.
Did you hear about the fragile myth? It was busted.
I can always tell when someone is lying. I can tell when they’re standing too.
Why did the egg hide? It was a little chicken.
A brown bear wandered into a hotel in Tibet and forced its way into a locked room with two guests inside.
Security camera footage from the hotel in Nagqu shows the bear wander down a hallway inside the building on Saturday and force its way through a door into an occupied room.
The guests in the room said they stared at the bear for a few seconds before it left the room on its own.
The hotel owner used a flashlight and other tools to scare the bear and chase it out of the building.The door has since been repaired and the hotel said it is adding additional security measures to keep bears out.
