Looking twice at a lady

A FEMALE doctor has set new parameters for the definition of sexual harassment. A mortuary attendant commented on her buttocks and promptly got a letter from the management of the hospital. The attendant thought it was about wage increases.

It was when he read the letter that he realised that his seemingly harmless comment about the doctor’s powerful behind was being mistaken for sexual harassment.

But the hospital referred him to its Code of Ethics and stated it categorically that merely saying the doctor had big buttocks constituted sexual harassment, the consequence of which was summary dismissal.

The attendant has denied the charge of harassment, saying he was not referring to the doctor’s bottom but to that of a ward assistant with whom he is on very friendly terms.

CHRAJ is handling the matter, and I don’t quite know if the doctor and female ward assistant in question would be required to present their body frames as exhibits to aid in the final determination of the case.

Limits

This particular palaver is a real test case that would set the limits to what can be regarded as sexual harassment and what cannot be regarded as such.

 I think in determining such limits, the Bible could be of help. Jesus is quoted as saying that if a man sees a lady and lusts in his heart for her, he has already committed adultery although he has not touched the woman.

Could this also be applied to sexual harassment such that a lady could press charges for sexual harassment if she could prove that a man, by his body language, lusted after her?

I hear some female groups have met and drawn up what constitute sexual harassment. One of them is that when you look at a lady in a certain way that suggests you admire her, you are in fact sexually harassing her.

Also when you look at a lady twice, then you must explain why. Why do you look at her, then turn round to look at her again? Such double sighting could lead to trouble for the beholder. So when you look at a lady twice, you quickly have to apologise for the second look and state that it was by mistake.

Does it, therefore, imply that when you look at a lady once you must ask her permission before you can look at her again?

“Taflatse, I have already looked at you once. Can I please have a second chance? I didn’t see the shape of your buttocks well the first time.” What a petition!

Purge

Well, Sikaman ladies have really started tightening the noose around the necks of the men. And pretty soon, men will be physically dragged to face justice to purge them of the sin of sexually harassment.

Believe me such men are in their millions. Some actually grab buttocks with five fingers, others grab breasts and others fondle. But the point of confusion is that some ladies enjoy the treat and even encourage it. Of course, others protest and scream to the high heavens.

So which one is sexual harassment? Is it only when the ladies protest or when they also enjoy it? The definition of sexual harassment must be very clear and unambiguous.

Now when women went to Beijing sometime in the 1990s, they came back with various strategies against men. Now marital rape is being crafted into a bill, so that when a man wants to have sex with his wife, he has to ask verbal or written permission, whichever is convenient.

If she doesn’t grant the permission, the man must go to sleep sad-faced. He is permitted to fume, but he can’t use force. If he does, he’d be hauled into the dock to face marital rape. If he doesn’t wind up at Nsawam, then of course, Akuse will be his resting place.

Now, can a woman be charged with sexually harassing a man? Legally, that is possible. If a woman, of mischief, or because she is on heat, decides to weigh your phallus, then you could report her to the police for sexual harassment.

The problem is whether or not the police will take such a case seriously. An amused policeman will tell you that if the woman wants it, why not give it to her? “This is foolish case!”

Freestyle

It is exactly like when a man goes to the police and reports that his wife has beaten him in a freestyle domestic brawl. The policeman at the charge office will look at his black eye and traumatised nose, and laugh.

“So you were standing there like a dummy and your wife beat you basaaa like this? Go back home, train hard so that next time you can put up a better show. How can a woman beat a man? As for this one, it is a foolish case.’’

“This article was first published on Saturday February 25, 2006

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