Protecting the Muslim home in the modern age: Communication, addiction, temptation, marital fidelity

All praise belongs to Allah, the Lord of the worlds. We praise Him, seek His help and forgiveness, and place our trust in Him. We seek refuge in Allah from the evil within ourselves and from the Consequences of our deeds.

May the peace and blessings of Allah be upon our beloved Prophet Muhammad s.a.w, his family, his Companions and all those who follow his guidance until the Day of Judgment?

As-salāmu ʿalaykum wa raḥmatullāhi wa barakātuh.

It is a great privilege to bring you this important topic for discussion.

Our subject today is:

“Protecting the Muslim Home in the Modern Age: Communication, Addiction, Temptation and Marital Fidelity.”

This is not simply a lecture about marriage.

It is a conversation about human beings, emotions, faith, choices, technology, temptation, responsibility and the future of our families.

And because I speak both as an Imam and as a certified counsellor, I want us to approach today’s discussion from two complementary perspectives:

The perspective of revelation and the perspective of human behaviour.

Islam gives us guidance about what is right and wrong.

Counselling helps us understand why people sometimes struggle to do what is right, how unhealthy patterns develop, and how people can be helped to change.

We therefore need both.

The foundation: what is marriage in Islam?

Before we discuss marital problems, we must first understand what marriage is supposed to accomplish.

Allah says:

“And among His signs is that He created for you spouses from among yourselves so that you may

find tranquillity in them; and He placed between you affection and mercy. Surely in this are signs

for people who reflect.” (Qur’an 30:21)

Notice three extraordinary words:

1. SAKĪNAH – Tranquillity.

2. MAWADDAH – Affection and loving attachment.

3. RAḤMAH – Mercy, compassion and tenderness.

A successful marriage therefore should provide: Peace + Love + Mercy. (Quran 30:21)

Marriage is not merely: “I found someone attractive.”

Marriage is not: “I want someone to cook for me.”

Marriage is not: “I need somebody to have children with.”

Marriage is not simply: “I don’t want to be lonely.”

Marriage is an amanah — a trust from Allah.

Your spouse is an amanah.

Your children are an amanah.

Your sexuality is an amanah.

Your wealth is an amanah.

Your words are an amanah.

Your private conversations are an amanah.

And your marriage will ultimately be part of what you are accountable for before Allah.

There is a well-known Ḥadīth of Jābir ibn ʿAbdullāh, in which the Prophet Mohammed (pbuh) addressed the Muslims during the Farewell Pilgrimage and spoke about the rights and responsibilities concerning women.

The author is the Chief Imam of Katamanso Municipal and Certified Counsellor and Governor Expert