Obaa Yaa
My landlady is pestering me
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I have been married for over two years to a wonderful lady I am four years older than.
Due to transportation challenges, we moved from Kasoa to Accra where we all work – but in different companies.
After going through the usual ‘hustle-and-bustle’ of accommodation searching in Accra, I met a young lady in her early 40s at a work gathering.
After exchanging pleasantries, we had some nice chat through which I told her I was looking for a place to stay with my wife.
She offered to help and truly, she gave me an address to a three-bedroom apartment for inspection and let her know whether I was interested.
I rushed to inspect it but the price the agent quoted was outrageous. After negotiating, he asked me to see the owner. To my surprise, this young lady happened to be the owner and decided to reduce the price for me to pay a year’s ‘advance.’
Few months after moving in my wife had a scholarship to study abroad. And ever since this lady visited once and got to know my wife had travelled, she has been pestering me for sex and has even asked me not to pay the rental fee if the current one expires.
Please what should I do?
Obed Samuels
Dansoman
****
Dear Obed Samuels,
Your situation is very dicey but God will see you through.
You should never try cheating on your wife no matter the situation. Let the landlady know that you are not interested in having any affair with her especially when you are married and you have a responsible role to play.
Let her know that you are in a position to pay for the rent every year and therefore will not stay in the room for free.
Have a talk with her and appreciate her for all the good things she has done for your family by saying thank you. Let her understand you value your friendship with her very much and would not let any affair or emotions ruin that.
You love your wife and these are some of the challenges that come in the marriage therefore you should not give up but be firm as a man to fight against obstacles and setbacks.
I wish you all the best in everything and always pray to God to help you overcome such challenges. Stay blessed.
Obaa Yaa
I don’t like his dressing
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I live with my parents and my sister. She has a boyfriend who frequently comes to the house. I don’t have a problem with that but I’m concerned about the way he carries himself around the house anytime he visits.
He sometimes wears only a singlet and pair of shorts to our place. He doesn’t dress formally.
At times, he even removes his top and walks bare chested. He doesn’t feel shy at all exposing himself this way to his prospective in-laws.
Any visitor to our house seeing this guy around bare chested may form a bad opinion about us.
And to add salt to injury, my sister is not helping matters. In order to avoid any hostility, we have talked to my sister to find a way to talk to him but it is not working. How can we handle this?
Alodia, Accra.
*****************************************************************************************
Dear Alodia,
IN my opinion, it is not out of place to tell your prospective in-law that the way he behaves around your home is not particularly to anybody’s liking.
You do not have to say this angrily, and in doing so, you must choose your words carefully.
On the other hand, your sister might also like this, but that is not the point.
The point is that you want a decent in-law and you might as well send signals about what your expectations are as far as your in-law is concerned.
Obaa Yaa
My mum sleeps with other men
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I lived with my mother and her actions bring a lot of embarrassment to my family, and I need your advice.
She is single and in my neighborhood, my mother is noted for sleeping around with men. What is more disgraceful is that she even sleeps with men younger than her in the neighbourhood.
Her attitude is really affecting me because I have always tried to be morally upright.
Could you imagine an occasion when I overheard some people mentioning the number of men my mother has slept with?
I have now become an object of mockery as I am the only child of my mother.
I am now confused, I feel like running away from home and never return. I will do this without informing her of where I intend going. I am 18 years and she is 38 years. Please help me out.
T.K, Bantama.
***************************************************************************************
Dear T.K
There is no point of running from the house without your mother knowing.
That would not solve the problem. This is the time that she needs you most because she may be frustrated.
Remember, she is your mother and you need to accord her that due respect.
Have a personal talk with her about what she is making you go through mentally and physically.
I believe that even if she needs a partner, she can go in for a responsible person. That can lead to marriage so that she’ll stop sleeping around.
You can also report her behaviour to your family head to talk to her.
